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i believe in Clichés...i believe in love

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Curses or Cures



The three words-Life,Love and Purpose
Have tormented me in so many ways
My heart,body,mind and soul have become their timid preys
They've driven a storm of angst without any pardons or parleys

Why is all my being consumed by these three words
Why does my mind plague itself with the questions with no answers?
Why does the heart wring itself with a thorny twine of faith just to form a pool of tears
Why does the soul try to lash it out on itself for having plain human fears?

What pleasure do I derive from these chaotic conundrums?
Why do I try to find the footprints of perfection in history?
Why do I relish the idea of construction of a life of ideals- when it’s a fallacy
Why do I still cling on to the path of purpose and not give into the maze of mediocrity

What is this inner struggle with this tyrannous triad?
The question of life is like a serene hermit regaling in earthy exultation
The question of love is like a voluptuous angel dancing in heavenly jubilation
The question of purpose is like an enlightened sage smiling in peaceful gratification

Life, Love and Purpose. Isn't everybody’s life based on these jumble of spells?
I ask and I ask,Is there a meaning to look for, beyond this limited territory?
Or is our existence a mere accident in God’s factory
Are these the curses of our lives or the cures? A querulous quandary!




Monday, February 3, 2014

My Sanctum.


This mind of mine is a strange camouflage
It portrays a life of beauty and ambition
But it lazes around losing itself in the mélange –
Of boredom, worry and petty meaningless fun

This psyche of mine is cunning
Tries to reason all the wrongs that I have done with a lawyer-like tact
Validate every lie that I have told by springing up a red herring
It says, at that moment it was not immoral and shameful of me to put on that act

This mind of mine is a wishful oracle
Trying to feed me with the infinite possibilities
Envisioning dreams to reach that abstract pinnacle
To take that step and rewrite the crude realities

This psyche of mine is a paranoid lover
It loves me dangerously, guarding my heart with ironclad walls
It is a sunny leprechaun walking around with a cleaver
Making people fall in love but never pays heed to their calls

This mind of mine is a schizophrenic dreamer
One moment it is full off fervor ready to take on life’s adventure
Next moment it withdraws cowardly into a corner
Scared by delusions and illusions of a life of artificial allure


Bombarded by care, doubts, fear and over protection
I suddenly realized this crowded creepy world infiltrated my priced citadel
And this mind of mine has actually become a palace under their construction
So I have to run away, I shall not let it become the Tower of Babel

I will build my own fortress in my solitude here
I will sit by the lake of mesmerizing silver memories and hum
I will water the blossoms of future that are ever so beautifully clear
This mind of mine shall be mine alone!!!---My Sanctum.



** [Tower of Babel:(Genesis 11:1-11) a tower built by Noah's descendants (probably in Babylon) who intended it to reach up to heaven; God foiled them by confusing their language so they could no longer understand one another]

Friday, December 6, 2013

THE GOLDEN COMPASS


                                                                      ********

PROLOGUE: We're always hoping that if we do the right thing,the right way, we'll be rewarded  but what if there is no such invisible rule. What if Life is Just life...not an example that we need to make something out of.
What if we have all been misguided by phrases like "Follow your heart" and "Everybody has a destiny".
Just What IF!!


                                                                    ***********

Be the Captain’ of your soul I was told
And I decided to sail on the waters with nothing but pure courage
With just the compass in my hand I decided to stand in the seasons of hot sun and shivering cold
I took the helm and burst out of the normalcy’s  ‘cage’

I proclaimed "I AM my own Captain, I AM the navigator of my life"
The ship’s sails are up; the anchors away and I could write my own story
Wrestling with the wind and cajoling the waters, getting through every strife
Each and every turn will be either MY folly or MY very own glory

The wind’s howling throws scares into my heart every day
The water's ferocious growling breaths ghosts of doubt into my mind, triggering regrets
But the powerful image of what I want to be washes it all away
The strength of the “dream” is much too bigger to succumb to empty threats

Instead, I sing joyfully in the painful tones of my hunger
I dance blissfully with the tired scaled feet of my slaving
I clap rejoicing each turn with bruised hands as each day gets longer
Each tone ,each step,each bruise is part of my story in the making

As I finally see my path, to truly believe it --the map I fervently clasp;
I’ll be seeing my dream come true soon, Ahhhh!! I am near it.
There is nothing like this feeling, knowing that your dream is within your grasp
I could almost taste it…I could almost hold it

How the wind felt against the arc of my ear
How my hair flew like a Lioness does while reaching for its prey
How my hands trembled at the wheel both with urge and fear
How my heart kept beating faster, uncontrollably; going astray

I scrambled for my maps, yes! It was supposed to be here, I’m here i am finally here
And there was NOTHING. The map must be wrong! I needed an affirmation
 The mad mind kept hoping my dream would materialize out of thin air, for the maps were clear
I frantically reached for the compass,I knew it had always showed me the right direction

That particular minute’s every infinitesimal detail will last with me for a lifetime
I'll never forget The diabolical black waters gushing and  flooding into my dream of an Eden
The boom in my ears with thunders of painful memory of shattered hope and laughs of destiny's devilish crime.
As i saw that The Beautiful Golden Compass, in my hand, the direction of my life--was broken.



               



Sunday, September 15, 2013

Do Not Resuscitate


Prologue : A legal form to respect the wishes of a patient not to undergo CPR or advanced cardiac life support  if their heart were to stop.}

{A relationship's monologue }


When do you know its over?
When do you stop being a pushover?
When do you stop pushing yourself into the same dark ditch
When do you realize it’s the same wound,and once again you need a stitch

Wrapped around by astronomical ego,The individualistic mess
The bubble is bound to burst  from the twin obsessions’ coarseness
Under the human tendencies of infidelity and mistrusts
Under the pressure of seeking constant childish attention,it rusts

Life in its twisted sense of humor finds love,that one sunny-dark soul
People with innate mad urge of masochism,start exhausting their hearts as embers of coal
I am formed in painful devilish delight  and a sweet tingling torment
Too hard to let go,too painful to relent

They are too demanding ,They  are  too harsh
They want lovely lilies and dandy daffodils in the marsh
They ask for sunflowers and a blue-moon at once
I’m meek yet I’m strong; I survive on this strange precarious balance

I know love’s dark magic;blinded and dumb,I still embark
When the whole world is rejoicing for an event I find myself in the dark
Because of the exchange of harsh words,and for the things said
I am hurt more by the the things that are hidden and that remain unsaid

When the light is fading away,I don’t panic about the dark instead I crave
I walk in far too deep;I relish the strange high of being in the imposing cave
But then;My feet have cracked from walking on too many thorns
My ears  scaled from ignoring far too many blaring foghorns

I  know I cant stay any longer in this darkness
All the previous sweet nothings have evaporated into nothingness
Constantly hurt by the truth and pulling myself up
I’m  done gulping down the bitter bullets unconsciously and waking up

And so next time I’ll be ready with a smile on my face for your gambit
I’ll relish that one last love lash,that one last blinding bullet
With my chin held high ,just to show that I tried,each time even  harder
But each and every time you only made me weaker and far weaker

And all that was ignited has been extinguished again and again
I’m done waking with a shock back into life with your conceited love’s bargain
I've bled and you each delighted in your own egoistic triumphs,and you still are
But I’m done, I’m done now and I've signed my DNR



Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Cherish!



Harboring the secretive little moments of the past in my heart,
Amicably reaching them again and again with nostalgia
Part of me never can forget the first rush of feelings,leaping like a hart
Passionate and loving words from him were like panacea
Yearning to be the most adored with a fervor that knows no bounds
Breathing in, breathing out with an enigmatic smile,in exultation
Inkling that something is amiss just from the way his text sounds
Rejoicing in his little victories, taking a step towards the greater destination
Trying to figure out what has been the problem for ‘us’ to end
Healing the sick silence between us into a comfortable friendship
Drawing the picture again,anew,where I take the form of a Friend 
A phase that is a blend of reluctance and sadness,takes true saint-ship
Young romance of mine,was hard for me to say bye to,but I did say goodbye
Special friendship,now, with a combination of extreme comfort and cautious restrain
Under the canopy of friendship I’ll cherish all that has gone by
May be I’ll keep hoping for it again, or may be,in time we’ll move on to another terrain
A future of unknown destinies with buzzing lives waiting for us,with an expectant gaze
Nothing will be regretted,the memories are far too up above
Those million seconds will never be forgotten-the words, the kiss and the embrace
He’ll always,always be the first man who made me dream of love.

Monday, April 22, 2013

Woman

{Inspired from and Dedicated to Amma,on her B'day}


Many a thorn were laid in your path
By God, by us, by others but you never showed your wrath
Nor did you escape it by taking a bypath
Instead you made yourself stronger living through that bloody bath

You’re the true personification of earth
Can we ever know your heart’s depth?
How does it love so? How does it love so?
Even after all that we put you through, how does it still love us so?

We never knew you were in shambles
For you smiled through all your struggles
You hold your Love’s hand tighter than ever, every time that he crumbles
Never letting your face show sadness or anxieties’ crinkles

You’re the true personification of universe
Can we ever know your mind’s expanse?
How does it bear so? How does it bear so?
Even after all that we put you through, how does it still bear us so?

You chose a Man who can cross the oceans for you
He is your partner in every sense of it, standing true
Your love can make the immortal lovers gleam with pride
Whatever tiring times life has to offer, with him you defied

You’re the true personification of galaxy
Can we ever attain your love’s potency?
How does it linger on so? How does it linger on so?
Even after all that life has put you through, how does it still linger on so?

You came out of cancerous blues
you pulled us out of every fiscal ruse
you instilled in us forgotten subtle values
you give and give, never do you say no by just finding an excuse

You’re the true personification of God’s apple
Can we ever know your soul’s eternal giving, a riddle?
How does it continue so? How does it continue so?
Even after all that we put you through how does it continue so?


You’re that grain of sand that holds in it the life of yesterday
You’re that drop of rain that holds in it the ripples of today
You’re that beam of sun that holds in it the reason for morrow
You’re a Phenomenon-yesterday, today, tomorrow!


You’re a True Phenomenon!

Friday, April 12, 2013

Life through Prism


I want to realize every sentiment the world has to offer me
The beauty of a new place in its earthy nakedness
The complexities of nature in its sensual wilderness
The inexplicable challenges of motherhood
The allure of Faith and its ambrosial food

I want to explore the extremities of human emotions
The unreasonable anger against a sinner’s sneering clout
The nagging soreness of self-questioning, reaping a dangerous doubt
The unapologetic triumph over it through striking artistry
The continual undying passion in the pursuit of quality

I want just a whiff of what all is out there
The inanity of leading a life in recklessness
The helplessness and desperation in sickness
The paranoia of never finding Love
The insecurities of my shortcomings growing into a mangrove

I want to be able to say I’ve experienced everything!
The burning shame in failure that plunges me into an abyss
The unabashed pride in meeting my luscious success
The nostalgia of past with its many a flavored seasons
The excitement of future for its numerous enigmatic reasons

I want to fight every inferior feeling by living through them
The stings of jealousy towards that prettier girl
The ghosts of depression leading me into a downward whirl
The aches of uncertainty before it clots me in its frost
The mazes of misery before I completely get lost

I want to taste every Infinitesimal feeling that is humanly possible
The pangs of estrangement
The pleasures of love in its entanglement
The bitterness of loss
The sweetness of friendship in it’s guiding ethos

I want to decipher every heart beat of mine
The deep urge to hold someone
The strangling eagerness to say I love you to ‘The One’
The delicious hope of someone’s kiss
The impatience to fervently hug someone and sink in it’s Bliss!

I want to live it all
Not a life in prison, in the trappings of monotony’s pliers
But a life that shines through the prism in countless colors
From life when I’m released, from this world when I’m absolved
At The Gates of Heaven, I want to say “I HAVE LIVED!”