She stepped out of the house,
The fierce wind greeted her like one of her own.
She took a step and walked on...
Her face was stoic but her eyes glazed with a film of transparent ache.
She invited the tears to come out, out to the world,
But she forbid them to be seen by the people.
Confused, the bashful tears stayed on her eyes.
She walked forth, strong in her strides, weak in her heart
She was not the kind who wore her heart on her sleeve.
She liked the wind, it made her free-hair fly about haphazardly
At least her hair stayed true to her mind, she thought.
She set her hair into place with her hands, “wish everything was that easy” she said out loud.
She passed by a haggard man with red angry eyes, squatting on the ground
And she saw herself in him.
She turned away painfully.
She stopped at the small shop, asked the shopkeeper to give her some onions
Her voice sounded alien to her, is this the voice they called sweet? She questioned.
He gave her the packet and smiled.
She felt her lips twisting into a smile.
She turned about and walked back.
Is that it? Turning about and walking back?
Thoughts climbed on each other inside her brain,
Trying to break the elasticity of sanity that was wound to the nails of consciousness at her temples,
She felt her mind contracting, expanding, contracting and expanding—
She thought it might collapse,
Freedom from the entangled cobwebs of thoughts- useless, ubiquitous, unconquerable
Maybe she would shrink down into a ball of grotesque flesh
More of an organism, less of a human
Maybe that is a better way to go on, exist, be…
Her eyes caught a young boy staring at the side of her t-shirt.
Ah! The supportive bra strap, inevitably out to invite the lewd glances.
Her hand rose automatically to push the strap in, but she brought it back down
She walked on, almost back where she began from,
Her howls still caged
Her tears, to the eyes, still engaged
Her thoughts in the cauldron of her brain emblazed
She stepped into the house and shouted “I am home”
Within her a thought knocked at her temple laughing “are you?”