About Me

Friday, February 18, 2011

A Stranger in the mirror

I can see the Sun shining on me..
But am numb to the warmth.
I can see the drops hitting me..
But am unaware of the bliss
I can see the pity in the eyes
But am oblivious to the compassion

I can see the food,colorful to the eyes
But it's still distasteful to the tongue
I can see Everything
But i feel Nothing
I can see the reflection in the mirrorBut it's still A Stranger in the mirror


Monday, February 7, 2011

baby-dom.

excited at the sight of colours...

just the gagaggogooo syllables...

laughing whole heartedly to something that's remotely funny...

crawling into the direction where they positioned you...

fascinated just by the clunk clunk coming from jingling keys...

so uncomplicated!

so un-toxicated...

wish i could be a baby again,

wish i could crawl once again just to lick something disgusting..without knowing what it is...

wish i could learn to stand on my feet and bring tears of joy to the whole family..

wish i could eat,drink,wail,yell..even pee

and yet they would think i am the cutest lil thing in the world...

oh!gotta bawl like a baby once again!

Sunday, February 6, 2011

My goddamn life!

You'll pick yourself up

..dust yourself off..

You''ll learn to smile again..

and live again..

so the 'apparent' experts say...

the scabs cover the wound..

but what about the ghastly marks left behind??

constantly reminding you..of

what has happened..

how it has happened..

every infinitesimal detail..

the wretched truth staring right into your soul..

slicing...crumpling...grinding your courage

pity laughs of self... echoing until the ears bleed

trying ..trying so hard to smile till the muscles ache

How do i fight this 'thing'...hha!it hasn't even got a name for god sakes!

'love lost'is the greatest evil...it kills you...it kills you slowly..

injecting a sharp pain into your nerves..

kills you when you are trying to take a gulp of breath...

kills you when you are trying to catch a wink of sleep...

reminds you of the terrile sight of you being happy..

reminds you of the pithyful sounds of your true laughter

bringing you down...

with a fine string...

pullin you leisurely from somewhere...

at each tug...you can feel the pain flowing through that invisible thread

and you keep on searching..trying to cut the connection..free yourself from it..

in the dark..you grope..and grope..and grope

but in vain

you wail for help

cry for some miracle...

After sometime..how much ever long that may be..

you run out of tears to meet your situation

you run out of theories to suffice your existence

You just need to wait for that moment..to perish

but the heart has already...

it has given up

lying inside..

dying..

withering..

decaying..

in the darkness...

you go numb

numb not from fear of death

but from fear of living..

darkness floods..

darkess engulfs...

darkness in which...you can't feel one's self!

Circussing love

My love for you is a circus..

i walk on that thin rope..

scared that you might walk out on me..

but keep smiling trying to assure myself you'll never fall outta love..

I'm like the lion..

proud that i can catch anything..and make him my prey..

but I'm helpless around you..

cos you got the hunter to hurt..

I'm like the trapeze artist above the world..

swinging away in my glory..

but when i look down to reality..

i realize..

how deep i can fall..without you.

tear stains

You and me..

that was the pretty picture i painted for myself..since my childhood..

me with that smile..you with twinkle in your eye..but,

suddenly you vanished..you erased of off you from it...

and mercilessly all those colors went outta my life!

Now i stand on that plain paper..in this laborious life...

All alone!

tear stains replaced that smile...

now..a pitiable girl..with few traces of 'once a lovely girl',

love lost in her eyes

Clueless...

joyless....

Lifeless!

All by myself

All by myself..

none to give,

none to take,

none to listen,

none to talk.

All by myself..

none to spoil,

none to pamper,

none to laugh with,

none to cry over.

All by myself...

no longing look,

no soothing song,

no caring caress,

no tingling touch,

no kindling kiss.

All by myself..

Living lifeless,

Living loveless,

All by myself..

Yearning for you..

Yowling for you.


Let go!

Walking alone..on this path..
milestones crossed.
myriad of thoughts gone by.
countless doubts left uncleared.
Just 'blind' faith showing me the light.. *snigger*
isn't it ironic?
the deep rooted hope..
giving me the strength..
the undeniable belief in the voice of the li'l girl..
within me..
incessantly telling me...
"go on..go on..he's there..waiting!waiting for you"..
Oh!get me outta this plight..
Burn this hope alive..
end it!
Let me start over..
with no dreams of you..
Let go!Let go!

Drugged..

One touch i long to feel

One voice i long to hear,

One  smile i long to see,

One grab at my waist i long to sense,

One last gasp i long to mark,

...under your control..

I think about it every minute..

mounting up daily..

making me thirsty for your lips..

hungry for your body..

my addiction for you has the sweetest pain of wanting you more than anything..

anything in this world!

surrender

You play my body like a melody on the piano..

You touch my lips like the dew touching a blossoming bud..

you breathe against my hair like the wind playing with the branches of the tree..

you surround me like a fierce tornado

you take me into your arms like the waves taking in the shore..

you say 'i love you' like nothing else matters..

To these i surrender..

I surrender..

I surrender to you..

completely!

Us

To look you through that window pane;
But not being able to reach you..oh!lord! that pain;
But now you're with me,right before my eyes,Here!
your atypical voice and childish laughter i get to hear;
You're in my own lil whimsical world The Baron;
without you,Oh!this world would be sullen and barren;
For you i care,
everything i bare;
For you i wanna be!
With you i wanna be!
Together let us be,
forever let us be.

Ripe

When you call me "beautiful baby"..oh my heart's on swing

those words from your voice..

tugging at my heart..

plucking my heart's strings...

How i love that feeling!

everyday i feel it..anew..

It doesn't get old...

your love doesn't get old..

it only ripes..

The one

MY VERSION:
I want to be the pillow you cling on to when you're insecure
I want to  be the quenching drops that touch your lips when you tremble
I want to be the wall you lean on when you're broken
I want to be the diary you let your anger out to
I want to be the one that gives you that mystique feeling
I want to be the ONE...
who's made to love you...made to be loved by you.


DAD'S VERSION:
How I wish I be the pillow
pressed to your chest when you are low
How i wish I be the drops that quench
your parched lips,ending their nectar search
How i wish I be the shoulder you lean on
to push away your blues,and give you strength to go on and on
How I wish I be the diary,where your feelings you pour
To become your alter-ego,to make a royal entry into your heart's door.